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Anchors That Make
YOU FEEL GOOD!

Overview

An anchor is an association between an emotional response and a stimulus.

Examples of a stimulus from the past can include a distinctive touch, seeing a place, a person, or hearing a haunting melody that causes a particular emotional response such as nostalgia or other strong reaction.

By using anchoring and the collapse process, you can re-pattern unwanted associations and responses.

There are three primary types of anchors: visual, auditory, and kinesthetic. We have many anchors that are generally created spontaneously throughout one’s life.

An automatically created VISUAL anchor in your mind’s eye could include, whenever you "see" a baby animal, you smile and go a little soft inside, "see" a poster of a starving child, you feel sad, or "see" a stack of bills, you feel overwhelmed!

An AUDITORY example might be, every time you hear a particular tune, you get feelings of nostalgia over your first "puppy love"; you hear an alert sound signaling good news and you get excited; you hear the words, "I’ve got some bad news," which could cause a sinking feeling.

A KINESTHETIC anchor involves a unique touch, taste, or smell. The odor of perfume or aftershave might bring back good memories of someone special; the feel of silk might create feelings of sensuousness; or the taste of cold milk might associate you into childhood memories.

This system will show you how to create your choice of wanted anchors such as feelings of delight, great presence, feeling loved, secure, safe, powerful, and so on.

It will show you how to use anchors to simply and easily collapse or defuse unwanted feelings, usually from some situation or event.

Anchoring is a self-use technique for adults, and with some age appropriate simplification, it can also be used by children. Advanced methods can be used by one person to benefit another person.

Setting an Anchor

For purposes of learning this technique, it is easiest to begin with anchors of touch. You may choose any self-touch that is distinctive and unique–specifically, a self-touch that you would not ordinarily do. For instance, touch the tips of your thumb and little finger together, tug on your earlobe, or gently squeeze the tip of your elbow.

For simplicity, we will use the technique of holding the tip of your little finger against the tip of your thumb on your dominant hand.

When first setting up a stimulus for your anchor, begin by sitting up straight with your eyes and body relaxed. Most people usually find it easier to concentrate in the beginning with their eyes closed.

Think of some pleasant experience while gently squeezing the tips of your thumb and little finger of your dominant hand together for a few moments. It may include feelings of being centered and grounded. These feelings are often experienced while resting in a special place in nature. Or it might include feelings of confidence, relaxation or courage.

Go back into your personal history (any age) and locate an event when you felt the wanted emotion.

Relive the experience, seeing what you saw, hearing what you heard, and feeling the associated feelings in your body. At the peak of the desired emotional experience release and relax your thumb and little finger (move apart), and open your eyes–if they were closed. This is called "breaking state."

Clear your mind by going to a neutral place for a couple of moments. This can be wherever you like–a room in your home, the park, taking a walk, anywhere, as long as it's a place where you are comfortable and at ease. Then return to the present and take a deep breath.

Stacking an Anchor

Stacking an anchor involves repeating the sequence on the same hand with several different experiences that reinforce each other. Some examples might include confidence, relaxation, courage, excitement, feeling loved, accomplishment, pride, competence, concentration, feeling safe and so on. The event should generate a powerful and positive response such as when receiving a deserved recognition for some achievement.

Some situations could include when your baby was born, graduating from school, winning a contest or a special award, completing a project, recognition for volunteer work, getting married, taking a trip to Disneyland, your first date with someone special and so on.

Testing Your Anchor

After you have anchored at least three positive emotional states, test the anchor. Hold it for 30 to 60 seconds and notice if those same pleasant feelings come back. If they do, you have an anchor. If they do not, you will need to repeat the original process as many times as it takes until the pleasant feelings occur. If it’s not working, you may take a break and return at a later time and try again.

Setting an Anchor on Your Other Hand to be Collapsed

Repeat the same process as you concentrate on your non-dominant hand. Begin by selecting a situation when you were dissatisfied with either the way you felt or performed. Maybe you were anxious or angry, or you said some things you’re now feeling guilty or bad about.

Using your non-dominant hand, put the tips of your thumb and little finger together just like you did with your dominant hand, relax your eyelids, and re-experience the unpleasant situation for a few seconds. When ready, release your fingers and clear your mind by going to a neutral place for a couple of moments. Test this anchor. If the unpleasant feelings return, you have an anchor.

After clearing your mind, decide what internal resource or ability, if you had possessed it at the time, would have made a difference. For example, you may have felt tense, perhaps ready to explode. If you had been relaxed, you would have felt more in control. Also, you would have thought of better ways of responding to the situation. In this example, you would find a time when you were more relaxed, such as bird watching, while sunbathing or getting a massage, listening to your favorite music, and so on.

Once you have selected your preferred response, anchor this feeling on your dominant hand. For instance, relaxation could go on top of your other positive resources on that same hand. Check it by holding your anchor briefly or until you feel better, and then release your anchor, clear your mind and go to your neutral place.

Collapse Your Anchor

Relax your eyelids. Holding both hands with thumbs and fingers touching, next connect the two hands by looping the fingers together, creating a chain link–the tips of all fingers and thumbs touching. Hold them in that position for about 30 to 60 seconds.

Just continue to breathe and notice what happens. When ready, release and relax both hands. (The negative feelings that were anchored on your non-dominant hand will simply collapse.)

The last step is to think about the original unpleasant experience and get a sense of how different it is. Sometimes it will be a little different. Sometimes it will be a lot different, and sometimes it will be completely transformed. Whichever way it is for you, you have experienced taking control of your life by changing your response.

Summary of Discreet Hand Anchor and Collapse

Keep your eyelids relaxed when recalling a memory. Clear your mind after each step.

Test each anchor by holding the tips of your thumb and little finger together for several moments, and wait for the wanted response.

If the positive response is not forthcoming, repeat the process as many times as it takes for you to get your desired outcome.

While reliving a pleasant event such as someone giving you a heartfelt compliment that makes you feel really good, anchor it on your dominant hand.

Stack the anchor with two or more positive experiences for greater power and intensity.

Review the unpleasant experience and identify the unwanted response. Anchor it on the non-dominant hand.

Select and generate a more effective and desirable response. Anchor it on the dominant hand.

Hold both hands together with fingers looped like two chain links for about 30 to 60 seconds. Experience the differences in feelings.

Fantasize two or three similar situations that you expect to occur in the future. Imagine how they will be different because of the process you have just completed.

Bonus

Whenever you experience a positive moment that feels good, add it to your anchor.

If you receive an award that puts you into orbit, anchor those feelings;

if you complete a project that is recognized as a great accomplishment,

and you feel really proud of yourself, anchor that; if you receive an unexpected bonus or gift, anchor the excitement, and so on.

Now these anchors become like a bank account. You can continue to "deposit" exquisite feelings, then whenever you are feeling, for instance, stressed, upset, out-of-sorts, anxious, worried or out-of-control, you can "make a withdrawal" while holding the anchor on your dominant hand for a few moments. You will experience all those positively wonderful feelings over and over again.
 

Need help?

If you encounter any difficulty while attempting to use the ANCHOR/COLLAPSE technique, and you wish to have some additional guidance, please feel free to contact either Dianne Ruth, CCH, PhD (619) 961-7500 or Judie Keys, CCH, (619) 961-7555 directly for help and a free consultation.


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